I Rang The Bell!

Whenever a patient has completed their radiation treatment at Mayo they get to come and ring a big brass bell that hangs in the inner waiting room!  I rang the bell Friday morning at 8:15 !   Good feeling.  Excuse the xrated photo used for this post but loved the joy expressed in this particular piece of street art! Note the beautiful Arizona tan.  Thankfully, although I have gained a couple of pounds from enjoying the good restaurants in the Scottsdale area, not quite that much! And having displayed my left breast to much of the medical community in both New Mexico and Arizona, I find bare breasts much less shocking myself.   But anyway, quick post as I have not yet unpacked or any of the many other things that go along with it, but gratitude to be home. And for life and for each of you that have followed me.I was told that the radiation will continue to work from within for about 2 more weeks and  I still have possibilities of complications such as lympodema,heart or lung injury etc but at this point everything is looking good.  My doctor and I are thinking positive!  So sending out hugs, love and gratitude this morning.  Now back to the first day of the rest of my life. . . . . . Sandy

Contemplating. . . . .

My last full day in the Pheonix/Scottsdale area. . We made it to Heard Museum North this week. This was one of my favorite sculptures in the courtyard there.  It is a much smaller version of the big Heard Museum but we also enjoyed visiting  Carefree, a community just north of the big city.  We had lunch on a sidewalk cafe and toured a couple of small galleries.  Mostly today I am contemplating my last doctor visit.  I have my list of questions ready.  I have my FeVa Fotos "Thank You" card ready. Before departing Monday,we had quickly printed some photos of the beautiful cactus blooms at the Mayo entrance.  I grabbed some cardstock to assemble them .  In putting them together yesterday, I realized that it wasn't my best choice of cardstock for those particular photos. Anyway, I guess it is the thought that counts and employees that had come in a different entrance said they had not had the opportunity to see these special blooms that were only open for one day.  What a shame.  There should be a message about "seize the moment" in there somewhere! Our motto for our photography has been "Share the Joy" and the five cards that I have assembled for different people or groups of people who have touched my life on this journey as a cancer patient is my humble attempt to share the joy of photographing those special blooms.  The cards with that photo were Tom's idea.  He has been such a good partner in this venture.  Between the two of us we manage to come up with some good ideas.  Excuse my morning ramblings.  Just contemplating. . . what lies ahead. . 19th treatment this morning. . final treatment tomorrow. Yeah!   Guess I am also contemplating what doesn't lie ahead because of the skilled treatment here. . .Gratitude for this whole experience.. . .Hugs and love to all. .. Sandy

How Do I Say "Thank You!' ??

Time to pack, again.  Heading back to Arizona again for my last week of radiation treatment.  Last week I was given a book to read about what after treatment is over.  I have been so focused on getting through these 4 weeks that I really had not given the "after" any thought.  I finally read it and did give me some food for thought for questions to ask at my last doctor's appointment on Thursday.  But also gave me things to worry about.  I don't want to worry.  I just want to have my life return to before cancer.  But I don't want to forget  the appreciation for life and health and friends and family and all of the other things that have loomed so much larger in my mind since I started down this path the first days of 2011.   I would like to be able to do something special for all of you who have sent me encouragement and positive thoughts and good advice and prayers.     I think I am going to be OK,   I think I am going to be a cancer survivor and there are so many  good friends, good doctors, kind nurses, supportive family and my sweet Tom all that have had a part in that.  I don't even know how I say "Thank You"  to that many for that much caring.   Ok!  Group Hug!  I am picturing my arms around all of  the above and the love is overwhelming! (I think Dr. Wong just blushed!)  Last week of treatment here I come!                    Sandy

On the Road Again

These have to be the most beautiful cactus flowers ever!  We have been waiting for this cactus to bloom for days and today was the day.  It is at the entry to the Mayo Clinic and we were able to take a series of photos prior to my treatment this morning. Breathtaking!  I found that running around the grounds doing photography and then getting on a table where you are to lay perfectly still is not a good idea. I was still breathing hard when they were ready to do the radiation treatment.  Had to really work at laying very still so they would hit their target.  I had the weekly radiation/oncologist doctor appointment after the treatment and he said all was going well.  But said that I still had quite a bit of fluid in the cavity area from the surgery but that it would slowly go away,although it may take several months.  I agreed with him that it would be best not to do a needle extraction of fluid  as long as I wasn't feeling discomfort. Big needle. .extraction from my tender body part. Wasn't a hard decision on my part! :)  Tomorrow is treatment #15 and it is home again to Silver City for another busy weekend.  Next week is the final week of treatments.  The last four are to be more targeted on the area of the surgery.  Then I'm done!  I'm done!  Yipee!  It will be so good to be home for good.  Grateful for a good day.  Guess at this stage of my life I should be grateful just for a  day whether good or not!   Gratitude isn't hard to find.  Love and hugs to all of you. . . Sandy

Life in the Big City

Hello all, I just wanted to check in and let you know that I am doing well as one can be .  as my old saying goes "not bad shape for the shape I'm in".  Treatment # 13 in the morning.  That is a lucky number isn't it?  The weather is mild for Pheonix and we are not planning our days that closely.  Started out for the Heard Museum today and ended up in a 3D cartoon movie-"Rio"-fun!  We came back to the motel for a nap and then for a swim and then found a nice little oriental restaurant for dinner.  Bedtime now!  Friends, friends and family, I find myself of thinking of so many of you so often. So grateful for your support and love and prayers.  Eyes are closing. . so it's goodnight. . sleep tight out there world.  Hugs and Love, Sandy

I'm Getting Over It

Right now , along with breast cancer, I am getting over pink-eye which started sometime last week.  The patient oriented culture at Mayo Clinic never ceases to amaze me. When I told the doctor I was seeing in radiation oncology that I had what I thought was an eye infection and that being from out of town I didn't have a local primary physician, a Mayo eye doctor who specializes in cornea transplants looked at my eye and wrote me a prescription!  So after going from red to yucky it is on the mend.

 Also, in the I'm getting over it category, this led me to feel that I need to stop apologizing and feeling guilty about not using our local cancer center and opting to go to Mayo once I was diagonsed.  I have praised the good care given by my general practioner and others locally  but when the radiation people at Mayo mentioned they were taking extra time with a proceedure because this needs to be perfect, I realized that perfect , when you are shooting radiation beams that close to my heart and lungs, that the commitment to perfect was what I came to Mayo for.

 I am getting over being angry at myself for the pounds that I have gained since I started this journey into the world of cancer back at the first of the year.  Size 10 is where I feel my best, size 12 is ok and as I slide toward size 14 I do it with regret but am no longer consoling myself with extra ice cream as I was during the nail biting part of this unknown trip, and know that I do not feel it wise to concentrate on weight loss while I am in treatment and can worry about that once the next two weeks are completed.  As I wait in my pink smock for treatment, and see those there also waiting for radiation treatment that are frail from what cancer has done to their bodies, gratitude for my strong, slightly overweight body is recognized.

 I am getting over feeling guilty about leaving my 13 year old doxie, Scooby Doo, at the kennel 5 days a week for the month.  She doesn't understand,seems depressed and has not been eating well and has lost considerable weight.  But this is the best solution for her.  It is an excellent, caring kennel and one of the employees made a special trip to the vets office for special food to entice her into eating last week.  She is thin and has the standard indoor outdoor  room  with elevated sleeping pad and not  the  luxury one with the TV and the real bed(really this is available) but I am giving her extra cuddling and extra exticements to eat well on the weekends. So Scooby Doo will get through this also.

 So, in addition to getting over cancer, I guess I am learning to cope better with life's little bumps.  And comparatively, they are so little and petty on my part.  So my eye is less pink, my radiated body part a bit more so, but I am feeling well and only two more weeks to go!  Grateful for that and for the 2000 plus visits to my blog.  I can feel the love! 

Big hugs to all of you. . .Sandy

Radiation Vacation

That is Tom's term for our month of May .   When we were trying to make plans for this venture into treatment, we thought of the different ways to handle the four weeks in Scottsdale and I think what we are doing worked out well.   There have been a lot of things going in our favor.  The weather has not turned to really hot on the temperature gage.  Most of the snowbirds and seasonal residents have headed north so the roads are not congested.  Treatment takes very little time out of my day so it leaves lots of free time. And I am having no side effects and not feeling "sick".  We have yet to run out of things to see and do in this area.  I really haven't done as much photography as I thought other than cactus flowers, etc. but we have explored many neat places.  This is including Nordstrom's Rack. . wonderful place!  Tom patiently sat reading his kindle while I shopped for an hour. What a guy!  And after tomorrow's      8 AM treatment I am halfway to the finish line.  And we get to go home and spend 3 nights sleeping in our own bed.  Grateful for that!  A lot to be grateful for as I was reminded of last night as we came out of the Red Lobster and an old man on an old bicycle asked if we knew of a "shelter" in the area. When we told him we weren't locals and didn't, he said he was hungry and humbly asked if he could have my leftovers I was carrying.  As we drove out and turned the corner, we saw him devouring the scraps from my meal.  Little doubt that he was genuinely hungry. I forced myself to not be judgemental about his circumstance. Pandhandling? Maybe. Alcoholic? Maybe. How he gets some good eats? Maybe.  But this I know for sure. . There but for the grace of God etc. .  Yep, we all have a lot to be thankful for.  Gratitude bigtime here for so much.

 Love and Hugs, Sandy